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Are Your Words Empowering You?

Words ~ You use millions of words each and every day. You use words when you aren't even aware you are using them. You think words, you write words, you speak words, you read words. Words are unique to you as a human, you have a select group of words that makes up your daily vocabulary.

You use your favorite words regularly without much thought to any affect they may be having on others, on you and on your energy. They are just words you think and say, words you have picked up from the people around you and adopted them as yours own.

Have you ever noticed how quickly you pick up the new "in" word or phrase? How when your friends or family start using the new word you do too? Have you thought about the energy that goes with the word?

I will give you an example of what the energy is. Let's look at one of the words that became an in word, "Cool" . What energy comes up when you respond with the word Cool?

For me, when I get the energy of cool, it is, that works, that meets with my approval, I like that. I get a sense of the middle of the road energy, not hot or cold, not high or low, somewhere in the middle.

Now adding to the word "Cool" changes the whole energy. Adding the word 'not 'lowers the energy of "Cool" and adding 'Real', 'Super' or 'Awesomely' all increase the positive energy of the word "Cool".

Now that you have a feeling of low energy and high energy, let's look at choosing a word that empowers you verses disempowers you.

Can't ~ Can't is a very disempowering word, it is defined by 'I am not able to or you have attempted to do it before and failed. Both these thoughts imply I am not able, or I have failed at that once so I can't do it, it brings up an energy of inadequacy. It lowers your energy.

To further explain what happens when you say I can't, your brain hears I'm inadequate or a failure. How does this work? The very short explanation is this:

When you as a child first came across something that you tried and it didn't work, you might have gotten frustrated or angry and throw the item down yelled I can't do this. Your brain developed a file of what "can't is". It is trying something and being unsuccessful and in frustration, or anger an outburst of I can't do this. That file stays with you, when you say the word can't the brain goes back the file and looks at what can't refers to. The brain comes up with the unsuccessful attempt, frustration and anger. Even if the reason you are saying you can't at this time has absolutely nothing to do with the original reference of "can't".

We use the word can't in many different places and different ways, each time we do this we are on some level disempowering ourselves with in this case, being unsuccessful, frustrated and angry .

Your situation may have brought up different feelings, whatever they were, they are attached to the word can't and chances are they were negative. Think about that, how many times do you use the word can't.

What would be an empowering word to use instead of can't? It does depend on the situation, here some examples.

  1. Won't~ If you really don't want to do it then say that. I won't do that. Won't means you can or are able to do something and you are choosing not to do it. It empowers you by implying you are capable of doing it and you are making the choice not to do it.

  2. Be Specific: If it is an issue of not enough time, skill, knowledge etc then state that. I am short of time right now, I can do that later, or "I would love to do that at a later date." If you don't know how to do what they are asking state that. "That is one thing I haven't learnt to do" Or that is one thing I have no desire of doing

What you are looking for is words or phrases you can use to replace the word can't. Freeing yourself from the negative energy you receive when you use the word can't.

Try this: Close your eyes and say the word I can't, how does that feel? Now say the word I won't, how does that feel? Can you feel the different energy?

A few years ago I noticed I was saying "No" in my head a lot. I came from a large family, maybe I heard the word "no "a lot. Anyway, I became aware of the many times I was thinking something and would stop and say to myself "No it's this way". It was very strange it was like I was having an argument with myself about a point of view I had. The more I became aware of what I was doing the more I realized how often I was saying "No". It wasn't just a quiet "No" it was a definite loud "No" and every time I heard the word I would back down on what I was thinking. I could feel my energy drain out of me.

I realized I had been doing this for years. Wow what have I been doing to myself all this time. I don't have to have someone else say no to me I'm doing it all day long.

What an amazing awareness for me, a real breakthrough. Now, what to do about changing it? I started by, every time I realized I was thinking "No" I would instantly say "Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes" Sometimes I would do a little tune to the word, yes, making it lighter and more fun. Instantly my energy became lighter, freer, happier.

It was a long process for me to make that change one no at a time. I have since learned to to speed up the process with a quick technique. When I say to myself "No" I say "It is no longer working for me to think "No," I choose to let go of "no" right now, take a deep breath. Instead I choose the wonderful word of Yes, I love the feeling saying yes gives me and right now I am choosing to say Yes, Yes Yes." When I think Yes it feels so good I want to jump and skip and play. Take a deep breath, feel the lightness the freedom.

This technique lets go of the negative word and energy and quickly shifts to choosing a positive word and energy and reinforces the new word with positive feelings sealing it in with a deep breath.

Once again the power is in the choice. Having the ability to make the choice to change your thoughts empowers you, it instantly takes you out of the victim energy and into the energy of power You are empowered. Changing your thoughts changes your world.

Wendy's words: A simple exercise I would like you to try is, think about the words you are using. Write down some you use regularly and go through them and ask yourself is this word lifting me up, empowering me? If it is a yes then that is great. If it is a no, think about what word you could use instead that does lift you up.

Another way would before you push send on your texts or emails quickly go through them and ask if the words you have used are empowering?

Being aware of the power of your words is the first step to changing your life. The change starts with you. Learning to empower yourself by choosing empowering words enriches your relationship with yourself and with others. It is life changing, so simple yet so powerful.

I encourage you to do yourself a favor and start using uplifting empowering words today, you will be so grateful you did.

Thank you for joining me today, it has been a real pleasure for me to write this blog for you. Check out more inspiring blogs at Also new in 2024 are my inspiring and empowering videos on youtube at hummingbird and owl. I am having lots of fun with that, it's been a learning curve that's for sure. Please check out my videos, and subscribe and leave me a comment, I would love to hear from you.

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